Friday, May 15, 2009

Cricket Jokes

Talks on the cricket pitch E-mail

At the start of the Indian innings(280 required for a win),

Ganguly to Sachin "I am not comfortable with Akhtar's pace. So I
will attack Akram and u take care of Akhtar."

After 4 overs(with hardly any runs on the board),
Sachin to Ganguly "These guys are bowling very fast. We will see
them off and then attack Mahmood and Saqlain."

After 13 overs(when Azhar Mahmood and Saqlain were bowling),
Ganguly to Dravid "I don't think we can score off these guys as
well. We will wait for Arshad Khan and Shahid Afridi. Surely we can easily
attack them. After all, Shahid Afridi is a part-time bowler."

After Afridi bowled some overs,

Dravid to Dhoni "Don't worry, Dhoni, I heard that England bowlers are easier to score off. We will play out 50 overs and attack in the next match."

At the end of the match,
Joshi to Mongia "Why didn't u try to force the pace?"

Mongia to Joshi "No, yaar. If I try to force the pace against these
bowlers, I will get out. There is only one way by which I can score runs fastly without getting out."

Joshi to Mongia "What is it?"

Mongia to Joshi " You have to bowl to me."

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Twenty20 World Cup Post Match Presentation E-mail

In the first Twenty-Twenty World Cup, post match presentation....

Ravi Shastri to Dhoni : "Congratulations to you and the whole Indian team for winning this world cup. You guys have produced a great nail baiting show.. and deserves the cup. We welcome you to share the joy with us."

Dhoni : "Thanks Ravi, the match was pretty close encounter between two great teams and our guys held the nerve to win the game and cup."

Shastri: "Who was the main reason for this thrilling victory?"

Dhoni: "All of us played well but I would say the main reason and man behind this great victory is Ajit Agarkar"

Shocked Shastri: "Agarkar ? ? .. how come Agarkar... he didn't play in the final"..

Dhoni: "Yeah.. that's the reason we won this low scoring match.. if he could have bowled in final, Pakistan would have scored the winning runs from his 4 overs...."

Shastri: "ok.. fine, To whom you want to thank for winning this final..."

Dhoni: "The team doctor deserves the credit... he really helped us to prepare for the final..."

Shastri: "Is it? ?.... how the doctor helped to prepare for the final... he is not the coach or physical trainer...Dhoni. . I am getting confused!"

Dhoni: "Ravi... nothing to get confused... he has failed Sehwag in the fitness test and so we managed to pick a good playing team.. thus we weigh the doctor's contribution as very high... infact its better than our team effort in the field.. our game tactic worked well"

Shastri: "To whom you want to dedicate this World Cup?"

Dhoni: "The entire team including myself wants to dedicate this cup to Sachin, Dravid and Ganguly..."

Shastri: "I really really appreciate you... its good that you have so much respect for the seniors....and you ...."

Dhoni interrupts: .. "Ravi.. let me complete... India would have exited in the Group matches if they decided to play in the series... thank god they opted out and we managed to play cricket and won the cup.."

Shastri: "The match was thrilling encounter and was concluded by a single mistake of Misbah.. Isn't it? "

Dhoni: "Yes you are right, after lofting the ball Misbah told me that he has send the ball to where there was no one....but he didn't know that there is a malayali in every corner of the world.... This single mistake has costed the game and won the cup..." Shastri faints and Dhoni receives the CUP.

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Shoiab Akhtar admits Ganguly is faster and quicker than him. "I haven't seen any one get out so fast. Man, I envy his speed.

I am quick but he is quickest.", he says.

"I think I should now cut my run up short when I bowl to him. Or else, he might be gone when I am half way thru my run up."

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